New Plan - Check!

With the addition of substitute teaching, I needed to come up with a new plan. I have become more of a list maker now that I am older. My brain just can't seem to store things in it's proper place as it used to. Things on the "priority list" seem to get dumped to the "things I can't remember list". Things I don't need to obsessively think about end up on the "priority list" and clog my thoughts with mundane tenacity. Thus... planners and lists have become my friends.

Planner #1
It first started with foster parenting that I began keeping a simple weekly planner for appointments and such. When we moved and stopped fostering I was happy to place that little planner in a drawer. Five months later I pulled it out when I realized that work, callings, and homeschool commitments were getting missed or I would reschedule because I couldn't remember something else was already planned. The main thing missing from my current planner is a weekly "To Do" list, a must have in next year's planner.

Mike likes to rub it in that he has a Palm (which I bought him two years ago for his birthday). I wish I could afford the fancy cell phone with data service and Blackberry apps. How sweet that would be! But, alas, our budget can't handle that kind of luxury. I guess I'll just have to cowboy up and use pen and paper. *sigh*

Planner #2

The second planner change was to add a check list type of planner for Nayna and Chris so that on the days that I am at work they do not get off track (keeps me on track too). They are both in Scholar Phase, but not all levels of Scholar Phase are the same. You can see this week's plan here. This is a form of Structure Time, not Content. They have certain criteria that needs to be done each day, but there is some choice as to fulfilling that criteria. We have been doing this for four weeks now and it is working really well. We had a few trial and error moments, but make-up work is a consequence...so my kiddos are much better at completing the list. ;-) The 2 child-planner sheet is from donnayoung.org. I filled in the basics that are the same each week and then copied the sheet. The things that change I just write in every week. I prepare this on Sunday during our Mentor Meetings (same as FEC meetings).

We still have our individual binders with student planners that I shared before. This one-page plan also has the appointments that affect them and the days that I work listed at the bottom.

Planner #3

My kids are very proficient at making meals, they have been for some time. We have come up with a system that the kids and I each make meals two nights a week, except Sunday. Mike is not home for dinner or he would take a turn in the rounds also (working 60-70 hours a week I figure makes up for it). You can see our meals listed here and who is cooking that night. The kids typically cook on the days that I work. Chris and Nayna can make a pretty awesome spaghetti from scratch.

Sunday is a day of rest for us. We typically eat left-overs or simple meals. I remember reading about Sister Kimball and that she didn't want to spend all day preparing meals on the Sabbath so she would prepare on Saturday. I felt that this applies to me, I also don't want anyone to slave away on Sunday in the kitchen.

Over time I have learned a great deal from Mike on organizing and planning. I'm thankful that I have a husband who values a "house of order" both temporally and spiritually.

Part-Time Working Homeschool Mom

I've had many questions about how I can possibly work part-time and still homeschool. Well...it is a bit tricky...

Job #1 - Kohl's
I worked a couple years ago part-time at night doing ad-set at Khol's...making a few cents above minimum wage. I often worked from 8pm until 2am two or three days a week, slept until 11am and then we did homeschool until just before dinner. That was difficult. I was always tired and sleeping was sporadic at best. However, the job was easy and I had great friends at work. I took that job to pay for court expenses and had that job when Mike was laid-off, a huge blessing as they gave me extra shifts and daytime work hours to help us get by. The main thing I miss from that job was the discount! Not that I can afford to shop there anymore.

Job #2 - Foster Care
After moving to Flagstaff we decided to become a Foster Family. This is NOT a part-time job, but a 24/7 endeavor to raise traumatized children. I spent all my time doing this and homeschooling was difficult to "fit in" sometimes. However, we learned a great deal from this, grew as a family, and learned to love and serve the less fortunate. We miss many of the children who lived with us and wish we could have kept little Bryce forever. The money was....well it is practically non-existent. Anyone who THINKS foster parents make money doing this is crazy.

Job #3 - Substitute Teaching
My current endeavor is to substitute teach part-time, one or two days a week. So far, so good. I make much more per hour than Kohl's or foster care (which I didn't make anything doing), I can choose to work or not work on any given day, and I can request more or less work days as needed. My young adults are doing the majority of their work while I am gone and I can check their progress, teach concepts that need my extra help, and oversee their education without too much being taken away from our routine. I have installed good work habits with my scholar phase kids and they are doing the same amount of work as if I was here. In fact, I think they are becoming much more responsible students.

Conclusion
Anyway, with our current status financially, I doubt I will be jobless again. We have missions and weddings to prepare for even after all our debts are paid. I miss the stay-at-home days. I had hoped to adopt and continue to be a mom at home, but it appears that this is not to be. **sigh**

From Bored to Busy

Nayna and Chris' Art - A Combined Effort

I don't know why I always do this, but every time we move to a new place I always feel like we will be eternally bored. Yet in a matter of weeks or a few months our lives are just as busy and hectic as they always are. This move is no different!

We are now busy as bees...

• Callings - Mike is a Sunday School teacher for 16-17 year olds. I am the 2nd Counselor in Young Women's. Chris is 2nd Counselor in Deacons.
• Weekly - Nayna (changed from Marly, she doesn't like Marly anymore) will be in homeschool choir. Chris is still hoping the football team works out. Plus, we have weekly park days for socialization and our Mutual activities.
• Monthly - TJED Teens Club, book colloquium, scout campouts, Temple trips, and church dances (called Super Saturday's here).
• Work - Mike is still working 60-70 hours a week. I am starting my part-time substitute teaching job.
• Volunteering - I am organizing several events including a Face-to-Face with Greatness seminar in October and trying to recruit other speakers for this area. Chris and Nayna help with that as well.
• Daily - Of course we are still homeschooling. I am only working 1-2 days a week. The kids will have their tasks to complete and will suffer the consequences if they have not completed them.

Considering that the St. Louis Temple is a 3.5 hour drive each way and we are trying to go once a month, which takes up a whole Saturday (and 1 1/2 tanks of gas), then I think we have successfully booked all our weekends. LOL! At least the yard is cared for by the owner. I thought our Flagstaff house had a lot of mowing, but Missouri is a whole other story...it MUST be mowed every week or it is a jungle.

Mistake #6 - Ignore the Written Agreement

Reference: Leadership Education by Oliver and Rachel DeMille, pages 212-224.

This is an area that I needed to work on. I only had a written agreement with my son that I did two years ago and it had more to do with him choosing to be here than about academic work.. My daughter is so intently particular about her education that I never felt like I needed one with her. I can see that the biggest problem is me. I am a lax mentor at times. I do not always follow through with checking over their progress and their work. In fact, I have about 2 weeks worth of journal writings to read. I tend to procrastinate the feedback part of mentoring. I find that I am more of a "weekly check-in" type of mentor.

Basically I realized I need to get my act together and that this is an area that I am making BIG mistakes in!

I decided to work on written agreements as follows based on the level of Scholar Phase:

Practice Scholar Agreement - see Leadership Education pages197-204.

"Do not make a formal scholar agreement with your student yet; just give her a daily option of doing Scholar studies that are more demanding than her normal Love of Learning schedule. It is not going backwards if she is on for a while, then off. For most kids this is normal and healthier than just going into Scholar and never backtracking into Love of Learning. Expect her to back out numerous times in the first one to two years. Support her when she does." - Leadership Education, pages 202-203

I was relieved after re-reading this passage. My agreement with my son is more of a commitment to educate himself at home since he went back to public school a couple years ago for a few weeks. That agreement was about him choosing to be at home and not bouncing between school and home. It worked really well, but most families will not need this at all unless you are detoxing your children from public school.

The main part of our agreement is a verbal one that study time is between 9am and 5pm...there are NO electronics unless for researching an approved topic or typing up a written assignment. Television is only used for watching items like a recorded Shakespeare play or a classic movie I have chosen as part of their education. After 6pm and all the family work is done, free-time allows for some limited TV and game play.

With Chris, I have found that in the beginning of Practice Scholar he leaned heavily towards Love of Learning and rarely towards Scholar. In the last couple of months he is gaining momentum on Scholar Phase and spends a larger portion of his day studying and reading. I don't have to ask or prod, he just chooses to do so.

Project Scholar Agreement - I am basing these items on Leadership Education pages 204-207. Another factor in considering what to include in a written agreement is learning styles and personal mission.

Responsibilities	Benefits
Family Responsibilities - Your own laundry once a week and Family Work chart as designated.	Ownership of responsibilities, not errands.
Study Hours: Daily: 9am - 5pm Weekly: Mon.- Fri.	Yearly Breaks: June and December Weeks of YW Camp and Youth Conference.
Assignments: Daily - Written summary due 5pm. Weekly - Fill-in own Scholar planner.	Mentoring: Getting a great education. Pursuing your mission with mentoring as needed.
Act like a Young Adult in morality and righteousness.	To be treated like a Young Adult in the home instead of a child.
Act like a Young Adult in continnual nurturing of relationships in the family.	To be included as a Young Adult by parents in settings outside the home, instead of a child.

This is a basic agreement and the one we are putting into practice has some specifics added that apply just to Marly. All I can say is that I am SOOO glad I decided to study the mistakes that can be made in Scholar Phase so that I could correct myself and gain better mentoring habits.

Embarking the Insanity Train

Why is it that I have difficulty handling my schedule? I know I should get rid of some things...but what? Showering?

Here is what a normal weekday looks like...

7:00am Get Kids up, Breakfast
8:00am Seminary Drop-Off (20 minutes each way)
8:30am Foster Kids leave to visit a parent - Mom and Dad have different visitation days.
9:00am Start School w/ Christian
10:30am Seminary Pick-Up (20 minutes each way)
11:00am Start School w/ Marlayna
12:00pm Lunch
12:30pm Back to School
1:15pm Foster Kids arrive home
1:30pm Foster Kids go down for nap
3:00pm Finished with School - Foster Kids get up from Nap
3:15pm Snack Time
3:30pm Appointments - CPS Workers, Counseling, Doctors, Therapy, etc. (Almost every day there is something)
5:30pm Dinner
6:30pm Guitar Classes, Mutual, Scouts, etc.
8:30pm Foster Kids bedtime
10:30pm Mike gets home
Midnight - Bedtime for me if I'm lucky

There is not even time on here to bathe the kids every day. I have to try to wake them up earlier, which makes for very cranky kids, or bathe them only on the nights we do not have anything outside the home...like Monday and Thursday and Sunday. Thank goodness their parents feed them morning snack and lunch.

Fostering is a full-time job...and I don't mean taking care of the kids. I mean the extensive over scheduling! These kids have no down time. They never get to relax. No wonder foster kids have behavior problems. They can never be little kids. They have more appointments than a college student. I had to buy a planner just to keep track of all their meetings, visits with parents, counseling, therapy, doctor appointments, etc. I've decided that fostering is WAY underpaid. I make lass than $1 per hour, per kid to take care of all this stuff. So basically less than $2 an hour. I've been accused of doing this for money...well...you be the judge.