Adult Transitions

I've written several posts about young adults (teens) transitioning to Scholar Phase. But, as I move into mentoring adults it is trickier to describe, analyze, and portray what transitioning to Scholar Phase looks like in an adult. This is largely due to the fact that we (the adults) all had a full conveyor-belt education. For those of us using Leadership Education methods, our children have been removed from that system (or are in the process of being removed) and being mentored by adults who are at least aware of what needs to change in some fashion. We did not have the luxury and we have several years of conveyor-belt thinking to "undo".

Adults transitioning to Scholar Phase are mainly blocked by fear -- fear of the unknown, fear of success, fear of worthiness, fear of being different, etc. I'm sure you can fill in your own fears quite well. I had a list of 12 fears when I made my list.

Here were my list of fears:

1. Age of when Scholar Phase "should" happen - I'm so old! Am I too old?
2. Impatience - I want it now!
3. Overwhelmed - It is too hard!
4. Time Commitment involved - I'm a working homeschool mom! When do I have time to study?
5. Application - "HOW" do I do it?
6. Preconceived ideas - Getting off the conveyor-belt.
7. Personal Experience - I was a good conveyor-belt student, but will I be a good Scholar?
8. College - Will my kids get into college?
9. Diploma - Will my kids education be accepted?
10. Graduation - Will they need this? Will they miss it if they don't have it?
11. Career - How will they make a living?
12. Initiative - I don't know if I have the "right stuff" to do this.

Maybe your list is different or maybe some things are similar. It doesn't matter if your fears are the same or different. What does matter is getting all your fears listed so you can face them...that's right. Make a list of all your fears so you can see what it is you are up against.

After you have made your list of fears, spend some time thinking about why you are afraid and how you might be able to overcome that fear. Is it a "real" fear or an excuse? Is this something that a change of attitude will cure or a challenge that needs to be rectified (example: spousal support, more education on the subject, etc.)? Is this fear a "stall tactic" to keep you from moving forward?

You...the Barrier

The biggest barrier to your success is...YOU! I have read countless self-help books that all pretty much describe the same thing...self-defeating behaviors because of fear hold us back from the things we want and need.

Some food for thought:

• Ninety-nine percent of failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses. — George Washington Carver
• Success is never found. Failure is never fatal. Courage is the only thing.  — Winston Churchill
• Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.— Thomas Alva Edison
• Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. — Thomas Alva Edison
• The line between failure and success is so fine that we scarcely know when we pass it - so fine that we often are on the line and do not know it. — Ralph Waldo Emerson
• One of the reasons mature people stop learning is that they become less and less willing to risk failure. — John W. Gardner
• We pay a heavy price for our fear of failure. It is a powerful obstacle to growth. It assures the progressive narrowing of the personality and prevents exploration and experimentation. There is no learning without some difficulty and fumbling. If you want to keep on learning, you must keep on risking failure—all your life. — John W. Gardner